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RECENT RESOURCES ON FORGIVENESS

Rarely does a month go by when someone is not talking about forgiveness. Whether it is a television segment on revenge or a newspaper report on the latest forgiveness research, the current hot topic in psychology is often in the public eye. Those of us in pastoral care and counseling shake our heads and say, “It’s about time!” What theologians and clergy have known for centuries, social scientists are now discovering. The result? A tidal wave of recent publications on forgiveness from theological, psychological, and pastoral perspectives. In this article I present my pick of the crop of current forgiveness resources. The books range from the highly theological to the highly psychological, and span the “easy to read” to “plough your way through” spectrum. Some texts are perfectly suited to those struggling with forgiveness, while others best fit the pastoral counselor.

For a rigorous theological discussion, pick up L.G. Jones’ Embodying Forgiveness. Jones, a UM and dean of Duke Divinity School, situates his in-depth theological exposition of forgiveness within the Christian doctrine of the Trinity as a counterpoint to (1) cheap therapeutic forgiveness and (2) Nietzche’s proposition of inescapable violence. Jones forcefully argues that the foundation for Christian forgiveness rests upon the divine prototype, where the self-giving Trinity bears the cost of forgiveness so that humanity may be reconciled to God. He challenges communities of believers to embody lifelong “practices and habits of forgiveness” that emerge from our grateful response to the Divine Forgiver and that are reinforced through the sacraments of baptism and communion. Jones affirms reconciliation as the ultimate aim of forgiveness.

Throughout his work, Jones draws heavily on the theology of Bonhoeffer and illustrates theological points with excerpts from fiction and non-fiction. Particularly rich is his exploration of the “craft of forgiveness” and his challenge to love our enemies in the absence of reconciliation. However, what Jones excels in theologically, he shortchanges in terms of practicality. We find no step-by-step counseling technique in this work. We may also wonder whether it is feasible to reproduce Bonhoeffer’s theological community upon which Jones’ basis much of his theoretical application. With these limitations in mind, I strongly recommend this text for those who are ready to engage a weighty theological discussion and are prepared to be challenged by Jones’ call for reconciling forgiveness.

If Jones’ book majors on theology, the next two books highlight psychological aspects of forgiving. In Helping People Forgive, D.W. Augsburger addresses developmental (H. Kohut, M. Klein, A. Miller), familial (M. Bowen), ethical (S. Hauerwas, A. MacIntyre), theological (R. Girard), and biblical aspects of forgiveness. Like Jones, Augsburger houses forgiveness within the relationship between the offender and the offended (as opposed to within the injured party alone) and identifies reconciliation as the ultimate goal of forgiveness. Unlike Jones, one does not need advanced training in theology to grasp Augsburger’s arguments for reconciling forgiveness. A particular strength of this book is its attention to the inner world and outward action of both wrong doer and injured party. Augsburger’s creative use of charts and diagrams helps readers to comprehend complex psychological concepts. In addition, he provides practical help to those who wrestle with forgiveness. Unfortunately, Augsburger’s discussion of psychological factors ignores the growing body of social science research about forgiveness processes.

Although Augsburger’s work is especially suited for pastoral counselors, To Forgive Is Human is definitely written for the person in the pew. McCullough, Sandage, and Worthington summarize the best of what social science research offers to Christians who struggle with forgiveness in a way that is engaging and readily understood. Every chapter includes practical suggestions on how to apply research findings to typical problems with forgiving. Pastoral counselors can facilitate the implementation of these forgiveness strategies in their offices or readers can “try this at home.” Topics covered include a sound discussion of the definitions of forgiveness, an important exploration of the role of forgiveness in our moral lives, various applications of forgiveness to either injured party or wrong doer, and the implications of forgiveness for families and larger communities. While McCullough, Sandage, and Worthington write from a clearly Christian worldview, we find no lengthy biblical or theological discourse here. Instead, their work reads as if they were sitting in your living room chatting with you about their own forgiveness stories and struggles, and then suggesting ways they have found—supported by psychological research—to address dilemmas with forgiving. In contrast to Jones and Augsburger, however, these authors present reconciliation as a desired, but often impractical outcome, and address forgiveness more as an internal process of the injured party than an interpersonal exchange between injured party and wrong doer. I like this work because it is so “reader friendly.” It tends to be the book I most often recommend to persons who struggle with forgiving.

For busy pastors, Harvey and Benner present Understanding and Facilitating Forgiveness. This work is part of Baker’s Strategic Pastoral Counseling series that features a “short-term (6 sessions), bibliotherapeutic, wholistic, structured, spiritually focused,” and explicitly Christian counseling strategy for promoting forgiveness. The text describes the application of forgiveness within the three-stage model of Encounter (establishing a working relationship and goals), Engagement (addressing the goals), and Disengagement (consolidating change and ending the counseling relationship). Understanding and Facilitating Forgiveness is a “quick read,” blending a sufficient, but not extensive, theological discussion about forgiveness with clear counseling guidelines for pastors. Three case studies situate theoretical and theological discussions within an applied frame. Many clergy will like this work because of its companion, Choosing the Gift of Forgiveness. This book follows the same general outline as Understanding and Facilitating Forgiveness and serves as reading material for counselees. Both texts are surprisingly comprehensive and at the same time they do not overwhelm the pastor or parishioner with too much complexity. Many clergy will like the short term counseling structure as it gives focus to each meeting and clear direction to the overall counseling process.

The Choosing to Forgive Workbook, by Carter and Minirth, follows a twelve-step formula for resolving unforgiveness. This workbook is written for the injured party. Each chapter focuses on one of twelve steps, but it does not mirror the Alcoholics Anonymous format. Surprisingly, this book avoids “pat” answers and lets the reader wrestle with some uncomfortable aspects of forgiveness. Laity will find the narrative tone appealing and many will benefit from fill-in-the-blank sections and checklist activities within each chapter. Like To Forgive Is Human, this workbook answers the question, What do I do to forgive? The Workbook can work well for individual or group settings. For example, pastoral counselors can use each chapter as homework assignments and process participants’ responses in the next meeting. I suspect that this book can work nicely for lay-led small groups as well. However, I believe that one word of caution is in order. Real forgiveness is seldom as tidy as our theories and rarely unfolds neatly in twelve linear steps. The very format of the book, while helpful on one hand, can set up unrealistic expectations: “I thought I worked through this step already.” Pastoral counselors and small group leaders should stand ready to support the multiple fits and starts that occur in forgiveness.

Exploring Forgiveness, edited by Enright and North, is a compendium of papers presented at the Conference on Forgiveness held at the University of Wisconsin in 1995. This groundbreaking conference, sponsored by a secular university, featured a multi-disciplinary panel of scholars—from the fields of social ethics, philosophy, psychology, counseling, criminal justice, and politics—in dialogue about forgiveness. In my opinion, this work captures the Zeitgeist of the times. Although theologians may have first dibs on forgiveness, they by no means represent the only voice in today’s discussion. This work expands our thinking about forgiveness, its meaning, and its applications. This is not a “how to” book, and readers may not find all chapters equally engaging. Nevertheless, Exploring Forgiveness will season our thinking about forgiveness with spices from a variety of disciplines.

Finally, for those who like to be on the cutting edge of psychological research, E.L Worthington’s Dimension of Forgiveness will be a satisfying read. This volume features symposia presentations from the 1997 conference, “A Journey to Hope: A Research Workshop to Launch the John Templeton Foundation’s Program to Encourage the Scientific Study of Forgiveness.” Although this work may appeal more to professors in the academy than to pastors in the parish, I nevertheless recommend it to all. Of particular interest to clergy are Christian and Jewish theological reflections on forgiveness by M. Marty and E.N. Dorff, respectively. Marty’s discussion of “quatritarian forgiveness” (Trinity plus human person) is especially rich, as is Dorff’s outline of the Jewish “process of return.” Although this comprises the extent of “theological perspectives” featured in the book, several chapters address the roles of religion and spirituality in forgiveness. The remainder of the text addresses themes salient to counselors or researchers, such as forgiveness in basic social processes, forgiveness interventions, and forgiveness in published research. While not dressed in explicit religious accessories, these chapters can be useful to pastoral counselors. For example, one chapter explores the victim role and grudge theory as factors that restrain forgiveness.

Dimensions of Forgiveness reminds us that good pastoral care embraces good psychology. Here is one area where the church has an opportunity to contribute strongly to the developing discussion on the process of forgiveness and all of its correlates. Those who want to be part of that conversation can begin by reading this text.

Although it is not directly about forgiveness, I would be remiss if I did not mention Battle’s Reconciliation. While Jones and Augsburger argue for reconciliation as the ultimate goal of forgiveness, Battle recounts D. Tutu’s experience with reconciling forgiveness vis-a-vis a discussion of Tutu’s theology. With its heavy emphasis on person-in-community, this book provides a necessary correction to the current trend in the U.S. to view forgiveness (and reconciliation) from a privatized and individualized viewpoint. Equally important is the discussion of confession, forgiveness, and reconciliation from a non-white, non-Western perspective. Battle holds our feet to the fire as we engage Tutu’s struggle with the injustice of apartheid and his theological understanding of the struggle to pursue reconciliation.

By Virginia Todd (“Toddy”) Holeman, Associate Dean of the School of Theology and Associate Professor of Counseling, Asbury Theological Seminary.

BIBLIOGRAPHY 
D.W. Augsburger, Helping People Forgive (Westminster John Knox, 1996).
M. Battle, Reconciliation (Pilgrim, 1997).
D.G. Benner and R. W. Harvey, Choosing the Gift of Forgiveness (Baker, 1996).
L. Carter and F. Minirth, The Choosing to Forgive Workbook (Thomas Nelson, 1997).
R.W. Harvey and D. G. Benner, Understanding and Facilitating Forgiveness (Baker, 1996). 
R.D. Enright and J. North, eds., Exploring Forgiveness (University of Wisconsin, 1998).
L.G. Jones, Embodying Forgiveness: A Theological Analysis (Wm.B. Eerdmans, 1995).
M.E. McCullough, S.J. Sandage, and E.L. Worthington Jr., To Forgive is Human: How to Put Your Past in the Past (InterVarsity, 1997).
E.L. Worthington Jr., ed., Dimensions of Forgiveness: Psychological Research and Theological Perspectives (John Templeton, 1998).